Saturday, July 28, 2012

Baturday dramasaurus

This morning, as I was going through my usual Saturday morning routine, I kept hearing this squeaking sound. I assumed one of my neighbours was using a crappy, rusted sprinkler in their garden. But the squeaking kept getting louder and more insistent, and finally I realized it was coming from the bathroom. I went in to find my cat, Adelaide, playing with something on the floor.

I pulled Addy away and thought the thing was a frog. Then I thought there was no way it could be a frog, because my apartment is on the second floor and, though we're close to the Rideau River, we're not that close. So it must be a mouse with all its guts torn out on the floor. Then I saw its little squeaking face, and I realized it was a bat.

I'd like to say I'm courageous and indomitable, but that little guy freaked the crap out of me. I pulled Addy out of the bathroom and shut her in the office, so she wouldn't go scratching at the door for her new favourite toy. Then I went back in the bathroom to find that the bat had squirreled itself under the radiator. I opened the window and tried to pry it out with a pen (gently - I love animals, and I knew it was just afraid), and then tried coaxing it with a cherry. Alas, it was not a fruit bat.

come bat me, bro (wikimedia commons)

In the meanwhile, Elizabeth had to take Adelaide to the vet. We haven't really kept up on her shots the past few years, because she's never allowed outside, and we figure, the dogs are up on their shots, so she's not exposed to anything. But the world came knocking. Apparently, we were breaking the law by not giving her rabies shots, but whatever. She's inoculated now, and only something like 0.5% of bats actually have rabies.

We called the city, as the vet told us we must, but they never got back to us. Eventually, the bat hopped into the bathtub where it set to snoozing among the shower curtains. I tossed a coffee can over it, slipped a cereal box underneath, and escorted it outside.

Bats have got to be one of the strangest animals. I mean, they don't have feet. Or hands. They're basically just wings surrounding this crazy little body. They're surprisingly cute, though, and I guess they eat a lot of bugs, so that's cool. But I really hope no more come into the house (either by some shoddy ductwork, or an old chimney, we're not really sure). Even though I now see the sinister narrative of bats as entirely ridiculous - they're rather pathetic creatures, all told, since they can't even get airborne without dropping off an edge to start gliding - I don't know if I'm cut out for the pest-relocation business.

-bn

1 comment:

  1. You must love the bat, he will cut down on your mosquitoes. Which I assume Canada has.

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