The first novel is being handwritten. To wit:
|did you think this post was about sex? don't be so callous!*|
On the other hand, I'm also writing a novel that is pure cream. And when I say cream, I mean it is a disgusting, filthy, awful thing that is produced by a terrible industry that takes advantage of weaker creatures in order to nourish disgusting human habits. Yes, that's right: I am producing a pulpy sword-and-sorcery for the masses. It's really wicked-awesome, and I am just as excited for this novel - and all its ancient artifact-wielding, monster-crushing, demon-raising goodness - as the other. This novel, however, is based entirely not on characters, but rather on archetypes, tropes, venial expectations and irascible wit. You can without doubt guess which tool I am using to produce this feckless tract:
|it's FocusWriter, bro, get with it.|
But, seriously, what strangeitude! Until now, quite honestly, I'm the sort of guy who would say god dammit but there is only one way to do things and that's the way it is, and if you're not with me well then I'll have to line you up against this wall and make an end of you. But no longer. I have indeed made an end of that very Ben, for that Ben did not realize that there is more than one way to do things, and the only way to do things is to realize that there is more than one way to do things. If you don't realize that, you ought to be shot.
Well, alright, that was my post. Thank you.
*If you didn't get this pun, you no longer have permission to read my blog.